Saturday, March 12, 2016

What it Takes to Love Unconditionally

I think most people know what love means because we know what it feels like, when we are receiving love from the right people. We all have a deep need to be loved, and we spend most of our lives either searching for it, trying to define it, or wondering whether true love still exists when love dies.  We all profess to love others until its time to put our love to the test, and show it through our actions, that we can still love in the most difficult of circumstances. Like the saying goes, love is easier said than done. I have come to realize not everyone who says they love, understands what it means, and only a few people actually know what it takes to love. I am speaking of love across the board not just romantic love. Love when you receive it, is one of the most powerful feelings in the world because it can heal your deepest wounds, it can wipe away your tears, it can comfort you in difficult times, it can restore your joy, it can breathe life into your dreams or any dead areas of your life, it can bring a sense of peace when it brings two people together in the perfect will of God. it can also encourage you during your darkest days, bring back your smile, keep you going when you feel like giving up, and cause your heart to be open to loving again. There is power in love and love is the greatest gift in the world because it conquers all things . Love can change your life in such a way that it profoundly impacts you as a person. You are just not the same person when you experience a love that is true, a love that is pure, and a love that is unconditional. This is what I mean when I speak of love, it is sacrificial, it is selfless, it is kind, patient, sincere, forgiving, it endures all things, and it never fails.
However, to be able to give this kind of love you will need to understand what it requires, and what goes into it to sustain it. This is what I hope to share in this blog. Love should not feel stagnant, whenever it is present, it grows. To love deeply, absolutely takes faith and the deeper, purer, and stronger your love is for a person, the greater your level of faith and trust has to be, to match the kind of love, you are giving. It’s impossible to love someone or something without risking a lot in the process, if the love is unconditional, it will require all of you. Love stretches you because you would have to give it again and again every single day. It’s not something you can give more today and less tomorrow, every day you wake up is an opportunity to love unconditionally.

True love takes everything and is the greatest risk, you’ll ever take in life. To love unconditionally is to love without a second thought, to love without reason, to love just because… giving all of you or what you have to another person to make their day or life easier, often times at your own expense. it’s a selfless kind of love that requires dying to self time and time again. To lose this kind of love from someone who embodies this characteristics, is to lose one of God's greatest gift to you.
           Nothing more will challenge you more than unconditional love, it’s a love that can push you beyond your limit, and will go beyond your human capacity at times because it takes God to love like this. It’s a love that is rare and very hard to find, because it is not an easy love to give. You will know when you are loving unconditionally because you will able to feel it and it will be somewhat painful. It becomes especially painful and stressful when the people you are loving, are not returning your love back, or worse have become comfortable with just receiving it. One thing I have come to realize about this kind of love, especially when it comes to romantic relationships is, two people cannot love like this and the relationship ends up falling apart. One of the reasons relationships fail is because either one or both parties in the relationship are not willing to put in the effort, commitment, and time, that love of this nature requires. They simply gave up on each other when life challenges became unbearable to handle, or when they experienced great stress in the relationship. Genuine authentic relationships cause pain, it’s a part of the package, no relationship/friendship is perfect. Sometimes the pain you experience in the course of the relationship or friendship, is not something you expect or can adequately prepare for beforehand. It’s something that when it happens you either know to rise above the pain or it takes you under. This is what makes unconditional love so hard because you don’t really know what you are getting into, it takes a maturing process growing into love. When a relationship ends after you have given unconditional love on a consistent basis, it hurts the giver profoundly, sometimes to the extent that it causes him/her to change because they have been fractured (hurt deeply). Why I believe everyone deserves love and should be loved, I don’t think you can show/give unconditional love to everybody. Not everyone can handle the capacity of this kind of love, neither can everyone appreciate it, if what they are used to experiencing is the opposite. When a person doesn’t understand unconditional love, or cannot comprehend receiving it, they will certainly abuse it or take it for granted. This is a higher level kind of love, so for the most part you will find a lot of people who are not practicing it, or who don’t know how to receive it.
The process of giving this kind of love often result in disappointment, heartbreak, and pain, because people generally have a limited understand of what it takes to really love on this level, and to add the people you love are going to be flawed and imperfect, which makes it tough. Don’t be discouraged if you experience great hurt in the process of giving it. One thing to keep in mind about unconditional love, which is very important to know is; it doesn’t always feel comfortable, when you’re giving it to someone, it may go against how you feel, it is not convenient most times, and you always end up loving a lot of wrong people (this is a given). Another thing to keep in mind is unconditionally love is experienced differently by people depending on who you are. However, the result of it always leaves a person feeling elated, grateful, at peace, and in awe that God loves you so much that he sent you someone, who brings you so much joy and makes you feel loved beyond your wildest dream and vice versa.
                When you have experienced this kind of love once or twice, it never leaves you the same. It starts to become a part of you, and sometimes what you come to expect from people in your life. This love opens you up to so many possibilities, and you begin to attract people who believe in this kind of love as well. Unconditional love in you will help you identify the one for you, because it will open your eyes to see the God in a person, and a mate who is patient, loving, and kind, because unconditional love embodies that. Unconditional love will also let you know when to stop fighting and when to walk away, with peace in your heart knowing you have done all you can. 

Pain is a Teacher

 People who have been called to heal will often go through the most pain. Their pain would provide the wisdom they need in teaching and helping others with their issues. Because they have experience a lot of pain themselves they will be able to relate with different people on a deep level that makes them feel heard & understood. Their words when they speak them will bring life & hit the broken parts of people who are hurting inside. The power and anointing of God on their gift, will enable them to reach & touch people in a way that would not have been possible, if they had not gone through that pain. Anyone who comes across them will experience divine healing because God's spirit resides in them.